“Oh, the joys of Progressivism.” Grisly Fan
If it weren’t for Progressivism, football would consist of a few Neandertals like Grisly Fan and Ursa Major and other geniuses bouncing coconuts off each other’s pin heads from the trees that they had always been afraid to come out of … until a liberal showed the poor, perpetually frightened trogs how to do it. And, the progression of ideas, changes and improvements in the game from that point down to its current form would be opposed by the backward dingbats every step of the way. Then, after each improvement had been made and established over their bitter, monosyllabic objections, they’d spend the day running around on all fours grunting in a self-congratulatory manner as though the new idea had been all theirs from the start … even though they’d never had an idea in their narrow, little lives or heard of a new one they didn’t hate.
See, it’s just like coach told you, “Sport’s a metaphor for life.” You were just too stupid to learn the right lessons.
