AJ versus Mothra: Who's better?

[UMclassof2002]

Winner: AJ

He'd be making all those shots from the "Jordan vs. Bird" McDonald's commercials except AJ would be hitting both Jordan AND Bird's shots meanwhile Mothra would be screaming like that little girl when she answers the phone and finds out she's going to the talent show at the start of "Little Miss Sunshine".


FTC

 

[UMclassof2002]

Right before tip-off, I imagine Gene Hackman talking to Mothra:

Coach Dale: "Their top player is number 23, Anthony Johnson. Of course he's their top player, it's a game of horse. It's just the one guy. He averages about 42 points a game over the course of things I've seen since EverettGriz told me to look it up on youtube. Mothra...you gotta stick right with him. I guess it's way past big speech time. Anybody have anything they want to say?"

Mothra: "I wanna win this one for my dad."

Coach Dale: "Your mother was a hermaphrodite. So was your dad."

Mothra: "Fuck you."

Coach Dale: "It's science."

 

[UMclassof2002]

Then, at the end, AJ hits the buzzer-beating shot just like Jimmy Chitwood in the movie. The fundamental difference being that he's already ahead by, like, a thousand (and he's playing a mutated Japanese butterfly monster). Whatever. Editing will take care of that.

 

[UMclassof2002]

There will, of course, be a sequel. The business model is, naturally, franchise in nature. AJ's star power demands it. I'm lining up directors as we speak and there's some weight on the list, ba-lee u me. Scorcese IM'd and..ummm..in the words of Whitney Houston, "Hell-2-tha-NO". What I have in mind is a reinvention of the "Jaws" franchise, except basketball instead of, well, whatever they were doing. Spielberg's agent/drinking buddy called right after the fact and was all "We get a cut and shit" and I was all "STFU b4 I tell everyone you secretly post as longhorn_22 on BNation and various grassroots homebased entrepeneurial cosmetics websites." The chatter from that camp subsided at that point. Anyways, so Scorcese (heretofore, "Marty") was all "I'll get DiCaprio to play the shark" and I was all "uh, we all saw Basketball Diaries...Leo can't even dribble, let alone pull off a scary 'dorsal fin, I'm comin to getcha' approach on dry land". Plus, Leo in a shark suit? What is this, SNL circa 197-Aykroyd? No way. And I doubt we can afford CGI (I mean, maybe. I was going to shoot off an SMS text to Sheila Stearns and see about folding this project into FY2011. I intend on submitting a "blue sky" budget of course, but don't tell her. I don't think she knows about this site. I'll submit a revised if necessary, but I hope not.) Fingers crossed

 

[grizaremoregooder]

Mothra's low post moves are way more gooder.

 

[UofMGrizFan]

Mothra may have better post moves, but A.J. will run him to death. My prediction A.J. pulls away late in an absolute blow out. GO GRIZ...

 

[AllWeatherFan]

Okay then, AJ versus Ditka...discuss.