As we are all aware time is our worst enemy and the self proclaimed hall of fame / icon of the Lot P tailgate is getting up there in years. My fear is that the health of "the master of kissing wives and shaking hands with babies" could take a turn for the worst at any moment. In order to avoid any future disruption of festivities, we are actively seeking one lucky individual to serve as an understudy to the aging Grizo406.
Applicants should possess the following qualities:
Be 21 or older
Have vast knowledge of Griz football and be objective in discussion of said team, knowing that things are not always "rosey" in Grizland
Use the phrase "We are gonna get rolled" extensively when asked to give your pre-game score prediction
Own a kilt and make it look somewhat fashionable
Drink beer of higher quality than that horse pi$$ Michelobe Ultra Light for Sissies
Have respect and knowledge of teams that reside out of the ever expanding big fluffy sky conference
Have a never ending supply of insults that are applicable to both Polsongriz and Alphagriz1
Be able to carry on intelligent conversation with Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike and Mike without forgetting who you are talking to
Be an ambassador to visiting fans, even to the likes of fans like Capn' Cat, D1B, Ralph etc.
Shave or wax at least one body part weekly
BE TALLER THAN 5'2" without wearing Doc Martins!!!!
*Tattoos and piercings are optional for male applicants and required for female applicants
Above all else, applicant must have an appreciation for and collection of vintage/retro Nike shoes.
If you meet these qualifications and think you are up to the task of hanging with a virtual plethora of folks who in high school were labeled "most likely to spend time in the bighouse or dance on a pole" , please bring your resume', photo portfolio and 3 letters of recommendation to the party in Lot P on game day..........oh I forgot to mention the requirement of riding the goat.
Disclaimers:
Offer not valid on days ending in Y or in states having at least one vowel in the name. Applicant must possess a spare liver. Consumption of beverages at the Lot-P tailgate has been known to lower IQ's, cause slurred speech and make one think they are more attractive than they really are. In Grizo406's case, objects in mirror appear much larger than they do in real life. Grizo406 may cause cancer in California. The Lot P tailgate is an equal opportunity discriminator, relatives and close friends of Grizo406 need not apply.
Applicants should possess the following qualities:
Be 21 or older
Have vast knowledge of Griz football and be objective in discussion of said team, knowing that things are not always "rosey" in Grizland
Use the phrase "We are gonna get rolled" extensively when asked to give your pre-game score prediction
Own a kilt and make it look somewhat fashionable
Drink beer of higher quality than that horse pi$$ Michelobe Ultra Light for Sissies
Have respect and knowledge of teams that reside out of the ever expanding big fluffy sky conference
Have a never ending supply of insults that are applicable to both Polsongriz and Alphagriz1
Be able to carry on intelligent conversation with Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike and Mike without forgetting who you are talking to
Be an ambassador to visiting fans, even to the likes of fans like Capn' Cat, D1B, Ralph etc.
Shave or wax at least one body part weekly
BE TALLER THAN 5'2" without wearing Doc Martins!!!!
*Tattoos and piercings are optional for male applicants and required for female applicants
Above all else, applicant must have an appreciation for and collection of vintage/retro Nike shoes.
If you meet these qualifications and think you are up to the task of hanging with a virtual plethora of folks who in high school were labeled "most likely to spend time in the bighouse or dance on a pole" , please bring your resume', photo portfolio and 3 letters of recommendation to the party in Lot P on game day..........oh I forgot to mention the requirement of riding the goat.
Disclaimers:
Offer not valid on days ending in Y or in states having at least one vowel in the name. Applicant must possess a spare liver. Consumption of beverages at the Lot-P tailgate has been known to lower IQ's, cause slurred speech and make one think they are more attractive than they really are. In Grizo406's case, objects in mirror appear much larger than they do in real life. Grizo406 may cause cancer in California. The Lot P tailgate is an equal opportunity discriminator, relatives and close friends of Grizo406 need not apply.
