Two boys were walking in a park in Bozeman and one was suddenly under attack by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy ripped off a board from a nearby fence, wedged it down the dog’s collar and twisted it, breaking the dog’s neck and saving his friend’s life.

A reporter with the Bozeman Daily Chronicle was strolling by and saw the incident. He rushed over to interview the boy.

“MEMBER OF JUNIOR BOBCAT CLUB RESCUES FRIEND FROM HORRIFIC ATTACK,” he starts writing in his notebook.

“But I’m not a member of the Bobcat Club,” the little boy told him.”

“Sorry, since we’re in Bozeman, I just assumed you were,” said the reporter.  He starts again, “BOBCAT FOOTBALL FAN SAVED FRIEND FROM VICIOUS ANIMAL,” wrote the reporter.

“I’m not a Bobcat football fan either,” said the boy.  “Well, gosh,” said the reporter, I thought everyone in Bozeman pulled for MSU. Just who do you root for?” the reporter asked.

“I’m a GRIZ fan,” said the boy with pride.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook, “LITTLE HIPPIE HOMO BASTARD MURDERS BELOVED FAMILY PET.”

All Lies, All Lies, What is this world coming to?

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